Pictures of Christmas Morning

Patiently waiting his turn...

Two of the "must-haves" that I was able to pick up at Target the day after Thanksgiving!

Realizing that he get an XBOX 360 from Santa!! Total shock on his face? I think so.

Oh boy! A Leapster from Mimi and PawPaw!

A marshmallow shooter from Aunt Janet and Uncle Stacy! Thanks you guys.... I find marshmallows around my house on a daily basis! :)

A Guitar Hero III for a Play Station 3??? Oops... Mike ordered the wrong one!

What? A box of macaroni and cheese? That tricky Mimi....
Here's the "real" gift... money!

The "infamous" coffee mug from Caden!

Merry Christmas

I just want to wish each of you a very Merry Christmas and a Blessed New Year! To family who is reading this from a far... I wish we could all be together for the holidays. Please know that you are thought of not only at Christmas, but each and every day.

With much love,

Mike, Jennifer, Cody and Caden

Random Thoughts

Christmas
Here we are 6 days away from Christmas. I have just about finished up all the shopping. I was at JC Penney's last night until 10:15. I asked the poor sales associate what time they closed and she said midnight. Ouch. I am so glad my retail days are done! All I have left to do is wrap a few gifts. Yea! There is a light at the end of the tunnel!
This is the part of the holiday I don't like. All of the running around, getting frustrated, trying to get everything ready... sometimes I think I lose the true meaning of Christmas in all the hype. I am really hoping that Mike and I (and possibly the boys... I haven't decided on them yet) can get away this Friday evening and spend some quality time together. As much as I would like for it to be a family event... I can't even remember the last time Mike and spent an evening out by ourselves. We'll see what happens...

Reality Time
Well as you may (or may not) have noticed, I haven't posted any weight loss updates over the past couple months. I had hoped to have lost 30 pounds by Christmas and since I am quite sure I won't loose that much between now and next Tuesday... I'm not going to make this goal. There has been so much stress over the past few months... from 2 kidney procedures to changing jobs (Excuses?...probably, valid excuses?... maybe.) that I've lost my focus. My will-power is still there and I am sure it will be greatly renewed as we get closer to the new year and the ever-dreaded New Year Resolutions. So... I'll start over and make another goal and see where I end up!

I hope everyone is well and able to enjoy the holidays with family and friends. Hopefully those who still have shopping to do will finish soon so you can relax a little!
I'll post again soon...
~jen

Full Ride Project

My husband just called me and told me to check out http://www.fullrideproject.com/. I am so proud of Southwest Honda and all of those involved with this wonderful project. It brought tears to my eyes. What a wonderful opportunity for one High School senior in our area! Please pass along this website to any seniors you know so they may apply for this awesome scholarship!
~jen

Caden

Christmas Caroling

Today Caden and his pre-K classmates performed a few Christmas songs for the parents. I couldn't be there because of my work schedule. I am so sad that I missed it but Caden kindly obliged my request for a private showing at home! He was so cute! Mike was kind enough to take a couple of pictures for me. Since he hardly ever takes pictures... only one turned out. I'm not complaining though! He did his best!

*Mom... remember this sweatshirt?

This was once Cody's when he was Caden's age! The front reads... Who needs Santa... and the back reads... I've got Mimi and PawPaw!

There is a Traitor Among Us

Caden has crossed over to the dark side. He's now an OU fan. I don't know where Cody and I went wrong. But somehow Caden has turned his back on his beloved Bevo and Longhorns. He still sleeps with his stuffed Bevo, though. So maybe all is not lost! I am sure that if I listen very closely... I'll hear my Papa yell Boomer Sooner once he hears that Caden has become a Sooner's fan!


Imaginary Friends

Caden just announced that he has 6 imaginary friends. 5 boys and 1 girl. What a imagination this little one has!

~jen

Lost

I’ve been thinking about this post for a couple of days now. I haven’t been feeling too well. I’m really tired, the cold weather seems to be affecting me more these days and I guess a little of the “holiday blues” are setting in. (Please… don’t worry… I’m fine… it’s just been a rough few weeks with adjusting to my new job, Dick’s passing, the kidney thing, the stress of all the holiday shopping, missing my family… etc.)

I feel so lost right now. I don’t seem to understand this world we live in. Between the mall shooting last week, the church shootings on Sunday… and I just read about another shooting that happened yesterday in Nevada targeting junior high and high school students while they were coming out of a school bus.

What in the world is wrong with our society? How does someone think that they have the right to go out and shoot and kill innocent people? Why does this continue to happen over and over? Even as I ask the question… what is wrong with our society… I know what’s wrong with our society… it’s the “world” that so many live in. It’s a world without morals, without the Golden Rule, a world where kids as young as Caden are exposed to guns and violence, and it is a world without Christ.

But where are we safe? Is there any place that’s safe anymore? How does one survive this world that we are living in? How do I send my kids off to school this morning and know that they will be safe? How do I know that my next trip to the mall… or the grocery store… or the post office… or church will be uneventful?

I know that faith in Christ is the only answer to these questions. I know that He is the only safe haven in this messed up world we live in. I know this. But why is it so hard at times to have faith? I know that I have failed Christ so many times. I have not been the person that I was raised to be. I have failed my children by not setting the best Christian example for them. I know all this can change. I know that faith can grow. I know that I can turn everything around and try to do what’s right.

I believe that there is power in prayer. I’ve seen it work in my own life. What this world needs is prayer.

Prayers for a better tomorrow… prayers for a better world for our children… prayers for understanding and peace.
~jen

Cadenisms 1 and 2

Cadenism #1

Last week Caden went on a field trip with his pre-school to go Christmas shopping for all of us (Mike, Cody, Boomer, and I). I had been reminding Caden before the shopping trip that he has to keep his gifts a secret. He can't tell us what he got us. Mike said when he picked him up from pre-K last week that Caden started telling him what he got me, Cody, and Boomer. But he didn't tell what he got Mike. Mike said that Caden got really quiet for a few minutes and he asked Mike all serious like... "Dad, do you drink coffee?" Mike asked "why do you want to know?"... and Caden said... "I just want to know if you drink coffee... that's all." Mike said "no" and Caden replied with "oh" and nothing else was said about the coffee issue.

Caden brought home is wrapped gifts today. He was so excited to place them under our tree. He began telling me that he got Boomer a bone. He held up my gift and said "this one is for you" and smiled. He then brought me Mike's gift and asked... "Mom, does Daddy drink coffee?". I told him no, that Daddy doesn't drink coffee. The saddest look came over his face. "But I got Daddy a coffee cup for Christmas." I assured him that Mike could put his pens in it or even some candy in it and keep it on his desk at work. This seemed to make Caden happy. Boy... I swear Mike better make the biggest fuss over that coffee cup on Christmas morning!

Cadenism #2

Mike and I have been "warning" Caden a lot lately that Santa only comes to see good boys and girls. We've even had to take it a bit further because Caden has been going through a very stubborn streak lately and we've had to "warn" Caden that Mommy and Daddy will start taking his gifts away (yes... I know it's horrible... but one can only deal with Caden up to a point before you start using the threats... aka "warnings"!)
Today Caden brought home his gifts for us and placed them under our tree. This afternoon, I overheard Mike getting onto Caden about something he was doing. Of course Caden became upset and replied to Mike... "That's not nice, Daddy." (This is Caden's new response when someone is getting onto him... "you're not nice".) Caden finished the comment with... "If you are not nice to me, I am going to take your gift away!" He was so matter of fact and very serious. I guess what goes around comes around!

Tagged

I've been tagged by Renay. I had to come up with an adjective for each letter of my middle name that describes me. It wasn't easy... but here's what I've come up with!

Mother; I love being a mom to my boys. I am such a cheerleader mom and I love supporting everything that the boys are involved in!

Indecisive; This is probably the one trait that Mike dislikes the most. As hard as I try to be in control of everything, I usually don’t know what I am doing until the very last minute and I’ve usually changed my mind at least 5 times before the final decision.

Caring; I think I am caring. I hope it shows to those who know me (and those who don’t).

Hugger; I am a hugger. You’re getting a hug whether you want one or not! I make sure to give both boys a hug everyday. Cody puts up a fight, but usually I can sneak one in!

Emotional; I tend to be very emotional at times. It usually occurs at a certain time of the month (if you know what I mean); but can occur at anytime, too! I'm one of those that has to have a good cry every few months... just to get it out of my system!

Loved; I know that I am loved by many.

Love to talk; I love to talk. I can talk to Renay 5 times a day, about nothing. I need details, though. Thank goodness I have Renay, because Mike and Cody are not detail-talkers!

Eager; I am so eager for Christmas to get here. I love the holidays. I love making all my favorite snack-foods for our Christmas Eve get-together, decorating cookies with my boys and my nieces and nephews, the laughter of family, the games, the twinkle of Christmas lights, watching Christmas Vacation for the 100th time, and watching everyone open their gifts.

Now, I am supposed to tag someone else... and since the only 2 people I know who have blogs have already been tagged.... I guess the game ends with me! More of you need to start blogging! :)

~jen

A Very Sad Day for the Conrad Family

Yesterday Mike and I learned that his uncle, Dick Conrad, collapsed and was taken to the hospital. He had been ill for some time now. He passed away late this afternoon.

My heart aches for this family… for his wife, for their children, and their spouses and children. I cannot even imagine the hurt they have right now. As sad as I am at this moment, I know it does not even compare to their pain.

When I became a Conrad, I gained another family (a very large family). As the years have passed, the relationships that I have with Mike’s family have grown stronger. I love each of them as much as my own family. To the Conrad’s reading this… I hope you know just how much I care for you and for your family.

Dick will be missed by many. I will miss his smile and his laughter.

Prayers for the entire Conrad family would be appreciated.

~Jennifer

Cadenisms

Earlier today while at the grocery store I promised Caden that if he was good during our shopping trip he could pick out a sucker. Before we checked out, I sent Caden to the sucker stand which was down just a couple of lanes from the one I was in. He came back with 2 suckers. Here's our conversation:
Me: "Caden, you should have just picked out 1 sucker."
Caden: "One's for me and one's for Cody, Mom."
Me: "Oh, that's nice to get Cody a sucker, Caden".
We leave the store and go home. Caden has lunch and then gets his sucker. A little while later he finishes his sucker. A few hours pass and then I see Caden sitting in the recliner watching TV sucking on a sucker. I asked him, "Caden... I thought you were going to give that sucker to Cody?". Caden replies with: "I changed my mind.". He grins with the sucker in his mouth.

What a little stinker!
~jen

Love, Love, Love My Job!

This week I have been teaching the high school lessons all by myself. I have to say that I truly love this job! Monday and Tuesday I went to a local high school located in the north-east part of town. I have to admit that I was very nervous about teaching at this school. After all it has it's own daycare for the students to leave their children while attending school. It's a very poor area of Amarillo where there are a number of issues that these children face day to day. But... it was such a blessing to talk to these kids. Granted probably 75% of them were already sexually active and a number of kids in each class already had a child of their own. Hopefully there was one who listened. Hopefully I made a difference to one child. It was quite an eye-opening experience, especially after touring the daycare facility on the campus.

This morning I traveled to just outside Amarillo to a K-12 school and taught. It was a great day, too. As the days go by, I've gotten more comfortable getting in front of the class and presenting these lessons. The kids are mature (for the most part... so far I've only taught high school kids), respectful, and want to learn.

Today I even had a little thought... I wonder what all would be involved in going back to school to pursue a degree in education? It's just a little thought... pushed way back there... just something to ponder and think about. :)

Hopefully everyone reading this is well, your families are well. We are all doing fine... just living life day-to-day. Both boys are healthy. Cody is staying busy with basketball. This week was a bye-week, his first official game will be next week. Caden's doing wonderful. He's adjusting to attending daycare a little more than he (or I) would like... but he's doing well. Mike's fine. Nothing new with him. And me... I love, love, love my new job! :)

~jen

The Madness that is the Day After Thanksgiving

Well, I did it. I survived my 1st day-after-Thanksgiving shopping experience. I vow to never do it again, though. For years I worked retail and I always dreaded 2 days... the day after Thanksgiving and the day after Christmas. Both days were absolutely horrible to work. Well I've decided that shopping on 1 of these 2 days is just as horrible.

My morning started at 4:30, and I was out the door at 5:15. The day after Thanksgiving novice shopper that I am thought... "oh there will be just a few people out this early". Boy was I in for a surprise as I drove past Home Depot and noticed that the entire parking lot was completely full.... at Home Depot! Heart rate begins to increase... a sickening feeling comes over me. This may be more than I thought it would be. Imagine my surprise as I pull into Target's parking lot! As I am parking my car, I realize that Target doesn't open until 6:00. The line into Target was about 4-5 people wide and beginning to wrap around the store. I decided to leave and run into Kohl's for a few things.

Kohl's parking lot is completely full, too! I decide to give it a try and enter the store. I notice as I am making my way back to the picture frames that there is a line of people that starts in the middle of the store and snakes it's way all the way through the store, to the back of the store and then back up another aisle to the checkout counter. There are people sitting on the floor, and the line never seems to move. I discover that the frames I wanted are already sold out, so I leave. Desperation sets in... what if I don't get anything on my list... what a waste of time this will be!

I make another quick run into Old Navy... same scenario. I leave empty handed. I decide that Target is where I need to be and drive back over to Target. I arrive at 5:40 and discover that the line of waiting customers now travels all the way down the store and wraps along the side towards the back of the store. Of course at this time... a light snow begins to fall. Perfect. I take my place in line next to "Mrs. Chatty Cathy". It is amazing what strangers will decide to share at 5:45 in the morning while waiting to get into Target. A store employee begins screaming where we can locate particular items. "The CD players are in the Women's clothing department... the video rockers are in the Men's clothing department". I begin to wonder if this is some sick game that the employees are trying to play on us!

Finally 6:00 arrives and after being almost molested by the group of people standing in line behind me... it was cold, but people... that doesn't give you the right to rub all up on those innocently waiting to get into Target!

We make our way into the store. I quickly walk to the Men's department to grab 2 video rockers for the boys. Thankfully I had paid attention to the employee who was yelling to us as to where to look for certain must-haves. I attempted to make my way to the toy section (all the while desperately trying to maneuver my basket with 2 very large boxes stacked on top of each other... which of course obscures my view of those in front of me). This proves to be too great of a task! I make my way to the checkout line. After standing in line for about 30 minutes to check out, and having been hit with the basket directly behind me 3 times, I left with 2 of my must-haves and a present for my nephew. So, all was not lost. The adventure proved to be worthy on some level.

Afterwards, I met a friend for coffee at Starbucks and we decided to venture to the mall. It wasn't as bad at the mall and I was able to pick up some great finds. Overall, I did well today. I have a number of gifts marked-off my master gift list. However, I think next year... I will let my trusty Dell do my work for me. I can shop online... in my pj's... coffee in hand... from the comfort of my own home! No getting up at 4:30, no cold, no snow, no weirdos standing in line next to me, no 30 minute-plus wait time to check out, no idiot ramming their basket up the back of my ankles THREE TIMES, and no grouchy store employees to ring up my purchases!

Ahh.. the joys of holiday shopping!

To all those who shop year-after-year on the day after Thanksgiving... wow! you are totally awesome or slightly insane! :)
~jen

With a Thankful Heart

Today I spent a few quiet minutes thinking about all that I have to be thankful for. There are so many to list... too many to list. Which means that I am blessed... blessed beyond measure.

I am thankful for my relationship with Jesus Christ. I am so very thankful for my husband and my 2 beautiful boys. I am thankful for my family and for Mike's family. I am thankful for my wonderful friends, especially my dear friend Renay. I have a roof over my head, a warm heater, food in the refrigerator, and cars in my driveway. We truly have so much to be thankful for.

I came across this Thanksgiving prayer and thought it was perfect...

Thank you, Lord, for the song of birds,

For the smell of roses,

unexpected, kind words.

Thank you, Lord, for a child's smile.

For the laughter of friends,

time savored in the while.

Thank you, Lord, for the little things

that mean so much to me.

For the new hope of mornings,

the softness of the night

and the knowing that I am free.

Have a Blessed Thanksgiving,

~jen

Whew! What a Day!

This has been one of those run... run... run days! My day started with volunteering at Caden's pre-school. This is always an adventure! Today was pajama day, complete with pancakes and a pillow fight! It was crazy (controlled chaos!), complete with a faulty breaker which caused our classroom lights to go out. We spent a good portion of our morning in the hallway trying to make pancakes! Keri (Caden's teacher) did an awesome job and was great under pressure! Way to go Keri! :) Caden had a blast during the pillow fight. In fact I had to remind him a number of times to hit softly, otherwise he could totally take some of the little ones out! He had such a good time. Unfortunately, he missed out on the rest of the planned activities for this afternoon because he and Cody had dentist appointments.

Both boys were free of cavities, thank goodness. Cody had a baby tooth pulled, which was an experience for him. He came out from the procedure looking very pale! He said he was ok, and it didn't hurt. He's done fine this afternoon. Caden has 4 more loose teeth, 2 on the top and 2 on the bottom! I kept asking if this was normal for his age. He's already lost 2 teeth! His hygienist assured me that he is developing just fine, just a little early. He has a 6 yr molar coming in, also! What a busy little boy!

After our dentist appointment, we met Mike for a quick lunch. I decided to go ahead and let Cody's Thanksgiving holiday from school start a little early, and kept him out of school for the rest of the day.

After a quick run home to drop off Cody, I went to my urologist for an appointment. I have decided to go ahead and have the remaining stone taken care of. Thankfully this time I will not have to have a stent placed! Hallelujah! I could have kissed Dr. Pate when he said no stent, just lithotrispy! So, the procedure is planned for Friday, Dec 7. Hopefully this stone will break up as easily as the last 2 and there will not be any complications. (Prayers would be appreciated!)

So, that's all of our news! What a busy day!
:)
~jen

'Tis the Season...

Well it was 82 degrees today and the air conditioner is running, it's only the 19th of November... so why not go ahead and set up the Christmas tree! :)

Caden and I set up our tree this evening. I know it's a little early... but Caden came across my stash of ornaments and decorations for the tree and has been bugging me nonstop ever since to get our Christmas tree up. Well, a sane person can only take so much... so we put up the tree. It wasn't quite the nostalgic moment that I wished it had been. Cody was rolling his eyes, muttering "I can't believe your putting up the tree this early", SpongeBob was playing on the tv in the background, and Caden ended up breaking a couple of glass ornaments.

So now instead of "when can we put up the tree?" over and over.... it's "how many more days until Christmas?" Ugh...

'Tis the Season...
~jen

A new baby to love

Congratulations to my sister-in-law and brother-in-law on the birth of their new baby boy early this morning. The boys and I stopped by the hospital to see our new nephew and cousin this evening. I got to hold him for a while and it was wonderful! It is so hard to even imagine that my boys were once that little.... especially now when they are both yelling and screaming at each other! :)
Congratulations, Angie and Apollo!
~jen

1st Teaching Experience

Well.. I had my first day of teaching today. It was nerve-racking to say the least! But I made my way through it. I taught the High School STD lesson today to both the girls and boys. I have to say I like teaching the boys more than the girls, probably because I have 2 boys and am used to them. It was a great day other than the fact that I had to leave Amarillo at 6:20 to get to Pampa on time. It was a very long day, but it doesn't even come close to comparing it to a 12 hour shift at the hospital! :) I think I am really going to love this job.
~jen

THE A TEAM!!

Cody sent a text message earlier.... he made the A Team in Basketball. If you are interested in watching a game, let me know and I'll email you the schedule!
~jen

Final Cuts Today

Cody should know at 12:00 today if he made the A or B Basketball team. He was told yesterday by one of the coaches that he made the team, he just wasn't told which team. He plans on sending me a text message with the letter "A" or "B" to let me know which team he made (oh the joys of cell phones!). As soon as I know I'll post a message on the blog. Exciting, exciting! I can't wait to watch him play! And luckily... he has a tourney this Sat, so I don't have to wait too long! :)
~jen

First Day and Other Stuff

Well, today was day #1 at Worth the Wait. I only observed today and it was overwhelming to say the least, but I loved it. I went to Amarillo High today... which was so surreal walking through those halls! After a few periods of the same lesson, I really got to looking at the kids in the class and couldn't help but think... this is going to be Cody next year.... sitting in high school.... listening to his mom talk about STD's. No just kidding... I could never do that to him! :)
Seriously, I really think I am going to like this job. I am so excited. I know that once I get the lessons down, and feel comfortable with them, and get in front of my first class... I am going to do fine. If you could only see the smile on my face... you'd know how happy I am about this job!

Other stuff...
I went to the urologist last week for my follow up. Everything remains the same. I still have a stone in the right kidney, about 5 mm in diameter at this time. The left kidney was clear. Dr. Pate said we could just hang out for a while and see what happens with the stone or we could treat it. He ordered some labs and said to come back in 4 months. I am seriously considering having the stone taken care of sometime over the next few weeks. Financially, it makes sense. I've met my deductible, so I might as well get it over this year. I plan on calling Dr. Pate in the next few days and see when he's available.
I had to take Caden to the doctor today. He has an upper respiratory and sinus infection. His throat and ears were clear. Thank goodness. We've started an antibiotic and a cough medicine. He doesn't act like he's sick, just a little run down. Hopefully he (and we) will sleep well tonight.
Guess this is all for now.
Love,
~jen

Decision Time

Well... here it is. I've made a decision. No turning back now. I've given my 2 weeks notice at the hospital. My director accepted my resignation. She was very pleasant and understanding. I offered to remain on staff PRN (as needed). My director said she would be happy to keep me on the schedule. I hope to work 1-2 days per month at the hospital. I've come such a long way and don't want to lose all that I have learned. I plan on finishing out this schedule, which ends on Nov 24th. I will start with Worth the Wait on Nov 27th. I am nervous, but very excited. We still have a number of issues to work out, but overall everything seems to be falling into place. I feel good about the decision. I just need to have a little more faith that everything will work itself out.

Thanks to all of you who have prayed, called with an encouraging word, or sent an email. I really appreciate your support and encouragement.

I hope everyone has a great weekend.
~jen

Itsy, Bitsy Spider....

Caden was a spider for Halloween. He decided a few weeks ago that he wanted to be a spider and he wanted us to make his costume. We had a lot of fun making his costume. He loved stuffing the legs and helping me glue the eyes on his hat.

Thank you, Renay for inviting us to your church's "trunk or treat". We had a great time!

~jen

Job offer

I received a job offer from Worth the Wait. I've accepted it, but I have second-guessed myself ever since. My hope is to sit in on a few classes tomorrow, and then take some time this weekend and really think this through. As much as I want this, as much as I am ready for a change from hospital nursing, I have to be practical and really think everything through. I would appreciate your prayers during this difficult decision-making time.
~jen

End of the Season

Cody's team lost today. It was heartbreaking to witness. They came into the game undefeated, and started strong with a touchdown right at the beginning of the 1st quarter, but the other team surprised the boys with a touchdown of their own. From there on, the boys just couldn't seem to get it together. Cody played one of his best games of the season, though. He had a couple of really great tackles right when we needed them and he even had an awesome interception. Unfortunately between him and his teammates, it wasn't enough to hold the other team from winning.
It was such a disappointing loss for the players and for the parents. I think I yelled the entire game. I was hoarse before the game... so you can only imagine how I sound now. My hands are raw and sore from clapping. I wanted this win probably more than Cody. I wanted what may possibly be his last football game to be one he remembered for all times. Maybe it still will be. Even though they lost... he played great.
~deep breath~ the tears are coming....
It is so hard to watch Cody grow up before my eyes.... I can't tell you how proud I am of this amazing young man. I know that there are still amazing moments to be had and I can't wait to experience them right along side of him.
~jen

Another interview and thoughts....

Worth the Wait called earlier today and wants me to come back for a 2nd interview. I didn't realize that this would be a multi-step process. It's tomorrow morning at 10:00.

I have never felt more lost than I do now. I honestly don't know what to do. I had a mini break-down yesterday morning and just cried and cried. Most of it was done in the bathroom away from Caden's view. Physically, I just don't feel good. I've had a head cold for about a week now and have not been sleeping well. Emotionally, I am drained. Part of me is so unhappy with work and I have been desperately searching for something else. When that "something else" (I've talked to someone in the Surgery dept, Angie talked to someone in the Heart Cath Lab for me, I've talked to someone at the Urgent Care Clinic, and I've been patiently waiting on Worth the Wait) doesn't work out due to what ever reason, it is such a let down. As much as I try not to get excited about a prospective job coming along, it is so hard to find out the answer is no. I feel like a broken record... I hate my job, I am so sad, I don't feel good, etc., etc., etc. Mike has heard me complain non-stop lately and I know he is tired of it. The boys are tired of having such a sad and tired mom. My friends, I am sure are tired of it, too.

And now that Worth the Wait has called back... IF I was to actually get the job (I am still being safe and practical... there is still a chance I won't get the job) a number of worries pop up in my mind....the schedule, Caden attending day care more, losing my health insurance at a time when I am not really sure if I should take such a risk, paying 2 1/2 times more on insurance for the kids with Mike's employer, I haven't even worked out the details on coverage for me... and the even bigger worries... is this the right job for me, can I do it, will I enjoy it?

I know that I have to let go and have faith. I know that. But when there is so much uncertainty to everything it just seems... and at times is... so overwhelming. I know my part of our financial responsibilities, I know I still have a stone in my kidney, our medical bills from my surgery are starting to come in.... do I risk what "good" I have with my current job... only to give it up... hoping that there is something better for me? I know that no one can answer this question for me. It is only my decision to make.

I have a scripture posted to the side of my blog,
"I will lead the blind by ways they have not known, along unfamiliar paths I will guide them; I will turn the darkness into light before them and make the rough places smooth. These are the things I will do; I will not forsake them." Isaiah 42:16
I can't tell you how many times I have read this. I know that I need to have more faith. I am trying. Hopefully sooner than later... this rough place will be smooth one day.

~jen

Latest Caden Story...

Earlier this morning I had Caden in the tub getting a much needed bath. I was in the bathroom with him curling my hair (I learned a lesson last week that Caden still isn't quite old enough to be left alone in the bathroom after I found our ceiling completely soaked with water and Caden sitting in the tub grinning ear to ear. I still have no idea how he managed to get water all over the ceiling...). I told him this morning during our little chat that after his bath if he cleaned his room I would take him to McDonald's for lunch. His response (this is word-for-word)... "I have a better idea... how 'bout I don't clean my room and you still take me to Mr. Donald's (McDonald's) for lunch?".
Where does he learn this stuff?
:)
~jen

Stick Family

I have seen stick figure family decals on numerous cars in Amarillo. I've been wanting to purchase one for our own car. I searched online this afternoon and came across a website where you can customize your own stick family. Here's one idea that I am thinking about. I think it is just too cute! There are so many figures to choose from!

~jen

School Pictures part 1

Caden and Cody both brought home their school pictures this past week. It is always fun to see how much the boys have changed from year to year. Here is Caden's picture. Cody's is in "part 2"!
~jen

School Pictures part 2

So for Cody's picture, I thought I would do something fun (I use that word loosely based on what I am about to post!). I was studying Cody's picture and thought... I have to find pictures of Mike and I in 8th grade and see how much Cody looks like us! Silly, I know... and there is so much other stuff I could be doing... like cleaning. But, I'm easily entertained...

so here are the pictures! :)

Cody~ 2007-2008

Jennifer ~ 1988-1989

Mike ~ 1986-1987

Waiting game continues....

Well I took matters into my own hands and called Worth the Wait this morning to find out about the job. They still haven't made a decision... so there's still hope. No official word on the time-frame on when a decision will be made but I am trying to remain optimistic and hopeful.
~jen

Waiting game

I have paced most of the day. Every time the phone has rung, I have thought... this is the call. I am still waiting to hear from Worth the Wait about the job that I interviewed for. I was told after the interview I would know something (either way) last Friday or today. As hard as I have tried to just give it up to God... it is so very hard. I want this so badly. It would be the perfect schedule for the kids and I. I know if that if I don't get it... there is a reason why. It is so hard to just let go and let God take over. Ever since last Wednesday I have prayed silently... if it is Your will, please let this be the job for me... if not, I won't question why. There is a reason to the answer.
~jen

The Cutest!

I have found the cutest flip-flops! I am seriously considering ordering some! They are Hot Flops flip flops and they are too cute! You know I want one in every style! :)
~jen

Pumpkins, Pumpkins, and More Pumpkins

Caden and I went to a local pumpkin patch to pick out some pumpkins for carving. We had a great time. (Cody being the typical 13 year old was too cool to go to the pumpkin patch with us... he decided he needed to start some basketball training at our gym this afternoon!) Caden and I, (I say that loosely... it was mostly me... carved 3 pumpkins. We made a cat, a silly face, and a toned-down version of a scary face. Enjoy the pictures!

~jen

By the way.... if you haven't carved your pumpkins yet, which I recommend waiting until next weekend... ours are already looking pretty dreary, here is a great link for your kiddos to create their own Pumpkin Stencil from Better Homes and Gardens' website! Even if you don't use it for carving, the kids will have fun creating different looks for the pumpkin! You may have to create a profile to use the website... but it's free and there are a ton of ideas for the holidays!

*These were some "bumpy" pumpkins!

*Caden's totally disgusted by the "gooey stuff". The look on his face was hilarious.

*Caden's saying "oooeeeyyy!". Cleaning out the pumpkins was not his favorite part of the carving process!

*Now for all of you who are noticing the knife... I was right beside Cade and had my hands on top of his while we were cutting the pumpkin (well, except for the few seconds that it took for me to snap this pic!) :)

Stories to share....

Sorry for my blogging slump. It happens every now and then! So where to begin....

On Tuesday, my parents and grandparents arrived for a visit. They were able to watch Cody play football and spend some time with us. Mom, Dad, Granny, and Papa... I am so glad that you were able to come. I know how hard the trip was, but we are so grateful that you were able to come. We enjoyed your visit.

On Wednesday, we all went to Cody's game. He had a great game. Crockett won and remains undefeated. Cody has one last regular season game next Tuesday, and then the play-offs begin.

Wednesday night I had an interview with Worth the Wait for a position as a nurse educator. I had applied for this position earlier this week. I didn't blog about it or really tell anyone about applying for the job. I really feel like I did very well with the interview. I did my best. It's out of my hands now. Hopefully I will have an answer tomorrow. Say a prayer for me.... :)

Today, I went with Caden's preschool class on a field trip to a local Corn Maze and pumpkin patch. We had a great time, except for the 30-40 mph winds and temp in the low 50's. Brrrr was it cold! The kids enjoyed the corn maze for the most part. We also took a hay ride to a pumpkin patch where each child got to pick their own pumpkin to take home. It was a lot of fun. Of course, I am totally exhausted and really wish I could take a nap! Here are some pictures of Cade from today.


Hope everyone is well.
~jen

Another Great Game!

Cody had a really great game today. He had 4 awesome tackles (one in the picture above) and he almost had a touchdown! He caught a pass in the end-zone but the ref's (who needed some new glasses) called Cody out of bounds! Crockett won 13-8 and remains undefeated at 4-0. Today's game was their first conference game, so this win was a big one! Next week's game is their last home game with only 2 more games left in the season before play-offs begin. Next week will be a special one with my parents and grandparents coming up to watch Cody play. We are very excited to have them here to watch what may be his last season of football.

~jen

Toy Commercials on the Rise

Yesterday while Caden was watching some cartoons he lets out this horrible... something is attacking me... I'm hurt... please hurry... "M-O-M-M-Y" scream. I immediately come running down the hall expecting to see one of my worst nightmare scenarios. I find Caden sitting the living room in the recliner, pointing at the TV and he calmly tells me.... "I want that for Christmas". WHAT?!?.... where's the emergency.... heart rate slowly decreasing from 160's... are you kidding me... you yell at the top of your lungs... only to tell me you have found yet another must-have toy for Christmas!
I calmly catch my breath and tell Caden that yelling "Mommy" like that is just for emergencies... like when he is hurt. He smiles and says "ok... but can I have that toy for Christmas?".
Is it just me... but as we get closer to Christmas is every commercial for a toy? :)
~jen

Three Things

I received this in an email... thought it was worth posting.
~jen


Three Things

Three things in life that, once gone, never come back
1. Time
2. Words
3. Opportunity

Three things in life that can destroy a person
1. Anger
2. Pride
3. Unforgiveness

Three things in life that you should never lose
1. Hope
2. Peace
3. Honesty

Three things in life that are most valuable
1. Love
2. Family & Friends
3. Kindness

Three things in life that are never certain
1. Fortune
2. Success
3. Dreams

Three things that make a person
1. Commitment
2. Sincerity
3. Hard work

Three things that are truly constant
Father, Son, and Holy Spirit

Latest thoughts, stories....

Caden made his first goal at his soccer game Saturday. He was so excited! I don't have any pictures to share. We sat with the sun in our eyes, so I knew that I would have a hard time getting any good pictures due to the sun. I am not sure who won... I usually don't keep track... but Cade had a great time!

I am slowly starting to feel better. I seem to have a little more energy and not feeling as tired. Yesterday while at work I stopped by our registration desk to pick up an itemized list of charges from my surgery to turn into to our hospital's version of Aflac. Wow~ talk about sticker shock! I was totally taken back by how much the hospital charges were. It's a good thing we have insurance!

This morning I found Caden sitting quietly in Cody's room. My friend Renay wanted to talk to Caden about his goal and when I asked Caden what he was doing sitting in Cody's room, he said "I am waiting for Cody to wake up". While I thought this was sweet, I knew he wouldn't be able to sit there quietly until Cody decided to wake up (today's a school holiday) so I told Caden that Cody was sleeping in. Caden quickly asked... "what's sleeping in?". Yes... let's have a little talk about sleeping in. Mommy can't remember the last time she slept in! :)

There is a crisp, cool feeling to the air this morning. It almost gives you the impression that fall is hopefully around the corner. I decided to dig out the hot-chocolate maker and make some hot chocolate! Yummy.

I hope everyone is well. We all seem to be doing fine. I do have a few prayer requests....
~Renay will be having some GI tests done tomorrow. Hopefully she will have some answers as to what's causing her problems.
~Prayers for my family. I am not going to go into anymore details, but my family could use your prayers for healing.

~jen

1 Year Anniversary

blog

noun
1. a shared on-line journal where people can post diary entries about their personal experiences and hobbies; "postings on a blog are usually in chronological order"

verb
1. read, write, or edit a shared on-line journal

WordNet® 3.0, © 2006 by Princeton University.


It's been a year since I started blogging. To think that over a year ago... I didn't even know what a blog was! And after 148 posts, I cannot believe how quickly a year passes. This one seems to have gone by much more quickly than the ones before. So much has happened in a year. From holidays, birthdays, anniversaries, illnesses, loss of job, a month of uncertainty, old jobs becoming new again, funny moments, accomplishments, venting, to a year of pictures.... this has been a great first year for blogging. I hope you will continue on this journey with me. It has been wonderful so far. I hope for those of you who are miles away... this blog brings you closer and you feel apart of our daily lives.
Thanks to all of you who comment to my posts. It is always a wonderful surprise to see a comment on the blog.
Much love to you all,
Jennifer

~A Steelers Family~

Update

I went to the urologist today.
For the most part everything looks "good". I'll start with the good news. Both of the stones in the left kidney were broken up and all that remains is the left-over "sludge" (tiny fragments of the stones, which need to be flushed out of the kidney). I do still have 1 stone in the right kidney. Dr. Pate removed the stent. I'll spare you the details. It wasn't as bad as it was 14 years ago, but still not a pleasant experience.
I will go back in 3 weeks for a check-up and we will begin some testing to find out why I am making the stones.
The bad news is that I may have to repeat this whole process in a few weeks to a few months to treat the stone in the right kidney. ~sigh~
As for now... I am hurting, but I probably did to much this afternoon after the appointment (went to Wal-Mart) so hopefully I can rest up over the next couple of days. I will be returning to work on Friday. ~double sigh~ :)
Thanks again to everyone for the prayers, phone calls, and for everything else. Mike and I really appreciate everything.
Love,
~jen

Post-op Day #2

Well.... I'm surviving. Just barely. Today is better than yesterday.... just slightly better. I am still pretty tired, sore, and I can tell when my 4 hours between pain medication are up.
Mike said that the doctor was very optimistic when speaking with him after the surgery. Dr. Pate said that the 2 stones in my right kidney came out while he was putting in the stent on the left side and that he was able to break up both stones in the left kidney. So, hopefully that is the case and I am stone-free. I have to go back in to the office this Tuesday to have the stent taken out. While I am glad to know that I only have a few more days with the stent, I am anxious about having it taken out!
Thank you to everyone who has said a prayer, called to check on me, cooked a meal, took care of Caden, and offered to help when/where needed. Mike and I really appreciate everything.

~jen

Kidney Update

First things first... I passed my stone today. Wahoo! I did take a picture of it (I knew my friend Renay would totally love to see it!) but I am not going to post it! It's just too gross! :)

On a more serious note....I went to the urologist today. I started hurting pretty badly yesterday, so I called his office twice (only to leave a message.... seriously... I cannot stand leaving messages at the doctor's office!) and finally got a phone call back late yesterday afternoon to come in this morning. My urologist, Dr. Pate, is wonderful. He really listened, has a great "bed-side" manner. He was pretty upset that I was even released from the ER Monday morning. Apparently I should have stayed in the hospital and had this taken care of Monday. He ran a another urinalysis and a series of x-rays. So here's the diagnosis... I have a total of 4 stones, 2 in each kidney. One on the right is starting to move and shouldn't be a problem. The other one on the right is in a "good" position and shouldn't cause any problems. Now to the left kidney. I have an 8 mm stone that will eventually block the ureter (the tube that leads from the kidney to the bladder) and it is not in a good position, it is starting to make it's way out of the kidney. I have another stone about 6 mm that will also be a problem.

So.... on Friday I will have to go in for day surgery. I will have to have a stent placed from the left kidney to the bladder under general anesthesia and then I will have Lithotripsy done to break up at least the larger stone. There is a limit to the procedure, so Dr. Pate may not be able to break up both stones in the left kidney. I should be able to go home late Friday afternoon.

I am not happy to say the least. I realize that this is what must be done in order for the stones to go away. I've been down this road.... 14 years ago and it was horrible. I'm hoping that it will be different this time. I was pregnant with Cody during that time before, so hopefully it won't be as bad. Your prayers would be appreciated. Not only for me, but for Mike and the boys.

Thanks,
~jen

14 years and counting....

14 years ago, Mike and I were married. For better, for worse. Over the years, we've had our share of the "for worse". But, somehow we made it through the darkest moments and have come out better than when we started.

One of my favorite songs is one of Brooks and Dunn, titled Proud of the House We Built. I can truly say I am proud of this house that Mike and I have built. We have come so far, and looking back, there are probably some moments that I wish hadn't happened, but it's those moments that have made us stronger.

Happy Anniversary, Michael. I love you today... and always.

~jen