Merry go Round of Life

Haven't been to the gym in over a week and a half.  Seem to have eaten everything in sight these last few days.  Not sleeping.  Awake at 3 am every morning (except today, I got to sleep in till 5:56 am).  Headaches every morning (day 5).  Can't get my mind to shut off.... thinking about work, thinking about my patients, thinking about the kids back to school to do list, bills, worries, stress, the list goes on and on.  I need the merry go round ride of life to slow down and let me catch up.  Need to find a way to get back on track.  I need to get my butt back to the gym before the 20 pounds that were lost are soon found! And when there's found pounds, there's usually a few extras!  I'm dreading stepping on the scale.  Dreading seeing the lack of effort displayed before me.

I hate this cycle of depression.  As soon as I get to a good place, a set back.  A little stress soon becomes a big stress.  Two cookies becomes 4.  One skipped workout becomes missing for almost 2 weeks.  Negative thoughts consume me.  Can't sleep. Headaches.  

Got to find that inner drive and wake it up.  Got to get back to a better place... spiritually, emotionally, physically.  The merry go round ride of life, full of ups and downs, continues....  

~jen