Contentment

contentment
noun
the state of being contented; satisfaction; ease of mind.

How many of us are truly content with our lives?  In this very moment, how many could say they are content?  Desiring no more in your lives. To accept this moment in time and be satisfied with things as they are.  Is it wrong to be content?  To be fulfilled?  Or should one desire more?  How much is enough for one to be content?

For me, contentment waxes and wanes.  There are moments in my life when I feel completely satisfied.  But then, there are times when I desire more.

I've contemplated leaving facebook.  Lately it's been a constant reminder to me of how green the grass is on the other side.  The planned vacation, the perfect job, the check-in somewhere exciting, buying a new home, perfect kids with perfect grades, accomplished bios, building a new home, current vacations, perfect pictures of perfect families, the best wife/husband, public proclamations of pure and perfect love.  (Yes, there are a lot of perfects out there.)  Doesn't anyone ever post the bad?  The competition for the perfect depiction of pure happiness is stiff out there in facebook world.  The world where we all sit behind our laptops, cell phones, desktops, sharing our perfect posts and pictures conveying to the world a sense of perfect happiness.

Ok, maybe that was a little harsh, filled with too many perfects. 

I'm guilty of gushing too much happiness to give the allure that my life is as perfect and happy as Susy Sunshine, facebook friend #945.  (For the record, I don't have 945 facebook friends.) Anyone else ever struggle with this?  I guess "this" should be correctly identified as insecurity.  Or maybe even jealousy.

I don't want to feel insecure or jealous of my friend's facebook posts, but in all honesty, there are times when I do. (Just keeping it real here. Confession is good, right?)

I came across a quote from the philosopher Montesquieu. “If we only wanted to be happy it would be easy; but we want to be happier than other people, which is almost always difficult, since we think them happier than they are.”

There are times when I long for the green grass on the other side.  But, the green grass on the other side may be nothing more than astroturf.  You know... fake grass.  Shocker.

I'm trying to shift the focus from the neighbor's lawn to my own.  Maybe with a little water and fertilizer, my own grass will become sufficient.  I only want to be happy, not happier or happiest.  Just happy.  And be content with that happiness.

~jen